Post by rsafan on Mar 28, 2007 5:53:27 GMT -5
Chapter 60
Mimi came around the corner and almost knocked both herself and Shawn to the floor. Had it not been for Shawn grabbing her by the arms, that’s exactly where she would have ended up. “You have got to stop running around like that.” he said, not letting her go.
“I wasn’t running, I was looking in my bag for my car keys.” she defended herself, all too aware of the heat of his hands on her arms.
He smiled, catching the slight show of annoyance on her face, “Maybe we should start over,” he suggested, “Hi Mimi, what you are doing here?”
As if it were that easy, Mimi thought, but chose not to spoil the moment, “Hi Shawn, I’m here visiting a friend and- what happened to your hand?”
For the first time she noticed the bandage on his right hand. He shrugged, “Kitchen accident.”
“Is it badly hurt?” she asked, her concern for his well-being outweighing her annoyance with him.
“A couple of stitches that’s all.”
“So what really happened?” she asked as she let go of the hand she had grabbed so suddenly when she’d spotted the bandage.
“You don’t believe me? It was a kitchen accident, Tory dropped a bowl and broke it, I picked up the pieces and cut myself in the process.” he explained.
Mimi frowned, “And she didn’t opt to drive you to the hospital? That doesn’t sound like her.”
“Yeah well what does these days.” Shawn muttered under his breathe.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.” Mimi was all too aware that she had never been meant to here his comment.
“She’s not exactly in the best state to be driving right now, that breakdown you were all expecting to happen, it finally did. She’s probably still crying her eyes out and besides, she doesn’t know about the cut or that I left the apartment for that matter.”
“Well then,” Mimi said as she pressed the elevator’s button indicating that they wanted to go down, “you’d better be getting home, there’s no telling what her mental state is, she might freak if she finds you’ve left.”
That hadn’t occurred to Shawn and he turned a worried gaze to Mimi, “Do you think that’ll happen?”
“Victoria’s strong, I doubt she’d fall apart because you’re not there, but than again, she’s hurting too. People act in strange ways when they’re hurting.”
They walked together out of the hospital and were surprised to find they were parked a few cars away from each other. “Well,” Mimi said as Shawn walked her to her car, “I guess I’ll see you around.”
Shawn smiled down at her, things were slightly more awkward between them since the day Zach had gotten sick, but it was a good awkward. The kind that arose when you’re first dating someone and you’re unsure as to whether you should kiss them goodbye or simply walk away. Shawn decided to do the latter and leaned down to touch his lips to Mimi’s, the spark ignited, it was a while before Mimi placed her hand on his chest to push him away. “Before we take this any further, we have to talk Shawn. Have a serious talk.”
He nodded, he knew things between them weren’t sorted and Mimi was not the sort of woman to ignore their problems simply because she couldn’t get enough of his kisses, it was one of the reasons he loved her so much. “I’m busy over the next few days, how about Saturday?”
That gave him three days to think about what he was going to say to have her give them a second chance. If he had known that just agreeing to talk had earned him a dollop of brownie points, he might not have worried so much.
“I guess I’ll see you around then.” Mimi said as she kissed him one last time on the cheek before getting into her car and driving off. Shawn stood there watching her leave and was reminded of another time she’d done so, the day she walked out on him, but then, she hadn’t held up her hand and waved to him as she drove off, smiling he turned to his own car.
Tory came out of her room, tissue in hand and swollen eyes, “Hey, I was wondering where you’d gotten to.”
He took the bowl out of its wrapping and handed it to her, “Melamine.” He explained, “Won’t brake as easily.”
She took it with a smile, “Kinda like me. How’s your hand?”
“How did you-”
“You didn’t clean all the glass, I figured with the blood…”
He shrugged, “It’s okay, just a few stitches.”
She grimaced, “I’m sorry, it should never have happened. If I didn’t act like a total lunatic, you wouldn’t have needed to clean it up and you wouldn’t have gotten cut.”
He chose not to inform her as to exactly how he’d come by the cut, she didn’t need to know that he only regretted that it hadn’t been due to the pulverising of her husband’s face that he needed the stitches. “No biggy. Are you hungry because with all the excitement tonight, I’m starving; I thought we’d pop down to the pub and-” he stopped because she was shaking her head, “What?”
“No need to, the Pub stopped by while you were out and brought dinner to us. Grandma Caroline was gracious enough to throw in dessert.” And another shoulder to cry on. She put the bowl down on the kitchen counter and went to the oven. “You actually just missed her; she wanted to stop by Chelsea’s before heading home.”
They sat down to an enjoyable dinner, enjoyable but quiet as each was left to their own thoughts. It was Tory who eventually broke the silence. Shawn peered up from his plate as she addressed him, “Yes?”
“I’ve been thinking about things. About my life and Lucien in particular and… What I’m trying to say is, ask really… I need your help with something but only if you’re willing of course –”
“Victoria just spit it out.”
“I want you to help me find out what he’s up to.”
She didn’t have to say who ‘he’ was, Shawn got that pretty loud and clear but he didn’t think she knew what she was saying, that she knew what happened to people who went against the Dimeras, “Tory-”
She shook her head, “It’s no use trying to talk me out of it, I’m not going to drop this; I don’t care how dangerous you think it might be. I need to know Shawn, can you understand that? I need to know where I fit into the plan; I need to know what role I was supposed to play, I need to know what damage I may have caused my family by living in that house with him, by bringing my sister into that house, my fa-”
“No!” Shawn shouted with such ferocity that she almost jumped out of her chair, “You do not blame yourself for any of this, anything that has or has yet to occur. You are not responsible; I will not have you feeling guilty over something he chose to do. You’re as much a victim in all this as his intended victims.”
“But-”
“No ‘buts’ Victoria.” Shawn stated adamantly.
“I want to stop him. I want to prevent him from hurting anyone else, I especially want him prevent him from hurting my family. I will do it Shawn, with or without your help; I’m hoping it’s with.”
“You don’t understand-”
She pushed up out of her chair and walked over to him, “No! Don’t tell me I don’t understand, you’re the one who doesn’t understand Shawn, you don’t understand that I have to do this.”
“No you don’t!” he pushed his plate away and got up himself, leaning over her, “You have no clue what the Dimeras are capable of, I do not want you hurt any more than you already are.”
“That’s not possible!” she shouted at him, not backing off for a minute. Why couldn’t he understand that this was something she needed to do, for her own piece of mind, she needed to know what Luc was up to so she’d know exactly where she’d fit in and how gullible she’d been. She needed to know if there was even a small chance that Luc loved her, that he wasn’t only using her. She needed to do this to feel safe, to feel that her judgement wasn’t as screwed up as she believed; she wanted to find out that Luc wasn’t doing anything evil or underhanded. And stupid as it was with everything she knew, she held onto the slim chance that she’d blown everything out of proportion; that somehow they could still be together because ultimately that’s what she wanted in the end.
“It’s always possible, as long as you draw breathe, its possible to hurt more. I don’t want you to find that out and I don’t want you dead, because that’s where a lot of people who mess in Dimera affairs end up Tory, and they don’t always find the body.” Why couldn’t she understand that she was endangering her life? Why couldn’t she see that in doing this, she would dispel all hope that Lucien Dimera was a good guy and then the hate and the bitterness would set in? If she found out his plans, it’d only make things worse for her. If she found out that she’d been used more than she’d thought at first, she’d make it her mission to destroy him and that would ultimately destroy her.
“Shawn please!” she begged, he could see the desperation in her eyes, hear it in her voice and he knew he shouldn’t give in but he also knew she’d do this without him if need be, just as she’d promised.
“Okay but we do things my way.”
She was about to protest then realised that he’d just conceded a very important point, she could do the same, “Okay, but I have one condition. You cannot tell anyone, most especially our parents.”
“Vict-” he cut himself short, realising that there might be some advantage to doing all this without their parents involved. The less people there were who knew, the safer it would be for the two of them. “Agreed but if things start getting heavy, we bring them in on this. I don’t think they’d appreciate being handed two dead children on a platter courtesy of the Dimeras.”
Victoria tried to shrug the comment off but deep down feared that Shawn was right. And if something were to happen to them, it’d be her fault that Claire and Zach grew up without a father, “Maybe I should ask Rex instead, he has less to lose and-”
“You asked me. Now, how exactly were you planning on bringing down Dimera?”
She went to her room to collect the file she’d been working on for some time, “If my years spent with my nose in books has taught me anything, it’s how to do research. I’ve also picked up a neat habit of filing away inconsequential things that may be of importance later on, things like telephone conversations or files lying open in the study, you know. This,” she handed him the file, “is what I’ve managed to come up with so far, it’s not much but it’s a start.”
Shawn opened the file and started reading; it listed every conversation she remembered between Lucien and Patrick, files she may have accidentally come across while in the study, business appointments he’d had. All they had to do now was connect the dots and hope they got the full picture. “You’ve been busy.”
She shrugged, “Like I said, I’ve been working on it for a long time.”
Shawn hoped some of the investigative genes had been passed down to the both of them. They would need all the help they could get, most especially if they were going up against a Dimera.
Chapter 61
Mimi knocked on the door; she still had her key but felt uncomfortable using it. She hadn’t used it since she’d walked out almost a year ago and didn’t feel comfortable using it now. Besides, Shawn had said he’d be home; that he was now sharing the loft apartment with Victoria did much to alleviate her fears about Belle. With Tory around, Belle would not be making a nuisance of herself; the two disliked each other intensely and could barely stomach being in the same room together. She knocked again and when there was still no answer, used her key and let herself in, maybe Shawn had gone out. It didn’t seem likely since he was after all expecting her but maybe he’d run out of milk or something.
She had placed her purse on the kitchen counter as she entered when she heard a noise, going to investigate. She managed to keep herself together till she walked into the apartment. Till she saw Rex and he asked her, “Hey, are you okay?”
Then the reality of what she’d just seen hit her. Belle and Shawn together, in bed. She shook her head, “No,” she said with a trembling voice, “I’m not okay, I’ll never be okay. Nothing is ever going to be okay again because I just walked in on my husband having sex with Belle, I don’t even know why I’m surprised. He’s sleeping with his perfect princess, someone who’s certainly more perfect than I am. God Rex, why aren’t I enough? Why am I never enough?” She held on to him, leaned on his strength, allowed him to support her. Then the sobs broke out and her knees gave in, had it not been for him, she’d have collapsed in a heap on the floor.
He held on, tightly. It had been so long since he’d held her in his arms; he’d forgotten what it felt like. Rex stood there, holding Mimi as she cried herself out. When the tears subsided, he picked her up and carried her up to the bed. Oblivious to where she was, only conscious of the pain, Mimi didn’t object when he laid her down and drew the covers over her shuddering body. She did protest at the removal of his body heat, of the comfort of another human being. “Don’t go, please don’t go.” She reached for his hand, refusing to release it. “Stay.” Moving deftly over her, as she wouldn’t release his hand, Rex settled next to her on the bed. Drawing her close, wrapping her in his arms, he offered her the comfort she sought, the comfort she craved. They didn’t talk, just laid there till they both fell asleep. She from exhaustion and he out of necessity, she still wouldn’t let go of his hand, even in sleep.
“Me? You were the one who grabbed me, I’d just come to wake you up. The way you asked me to. I wasn’t expecting you to jump all over me.” Belle responded, matching Shawn’s anger.
“I thought you were Mimi.”
“Yeah, so I heard.” In the instant he’d murmured Mimi’s name, all her hopes had been shattered; she knew then that there could be no future for the two of them because Shawn was still very much in love with his wife.
“Why would you even do something like this? If Mimi had walked in… Did you plan this, so that she would walk in?”
“No! You have a very high opinion of yourself.”
“You’ve made it perfectly clear over the last few months that you wanted us to be together. That you would do almost anything to see that happening.”
“Yeah, and Mimi made it perfectly clear that she didn’t want you back, that she wouldn’t even bother fighting for you. All I have to do is sit back and wait till you’re free, I don’t have to resort to schemes to get the two of you apart; you already are.”
“No, this is just temporary, until we sort out a few things. Then we’ll be right on track again. We’ll be together again.”
“I love that you’re so optimistic, that you can still believe that after all that has happened this past year, Mimi’s simply going to come back to you. I love that you still believe Mimi’s going to give you the time of day when she’s living with her ex boyfriend, no wait, her ex-fiancé.”
“They’re just friends and I’m her husband, she actually married me.”
“Only because Rex left. Just think Shawn, if Rex had stuck around, you would never have been with Mimi. No, those two would probably be playing house right now. Oh wait,” she said, covering her mouth in mock shock, “they already are. I wonder how long it’ll be before Zach is calling Rex ‘daddy’.”
That struck a nerve, especially since his daughter already called someone else ‘daddy’, “You’re wrong, Mimi is over Rex. He’s her past.”
“The same way you are. Now if you’d excuse me, I have a daughter who’ll be home any minute.”
“Belle’s only trying to mess with my head, Mimi is not with Rex.” There’s only one way to find out for sure. Grabbing his things, he left the loft. Belle watched as he stormed out.
That’s right Shawn, she thought, go see for yourself.
“What the hell is going on here?” she sat up at the same time Rex did and saw Shawn standing at the top of the stairs, murder in his eyes.
“What does it look like?” she asked him innocently, knowing full well what he thought.
“It looks like…”
But Rex, not willing to be dragged into their game interrupted Shawn, “Open your eyes man. We’re both fully dressed and what’s more, she was under the covers and I was on them when you came barging in here. Which by the way, you had no right to do considering you don’t live here.”
“I have every right considering that my son stays here and my sister gave me a key.”
“Whatever.” Rex said as he climbed off the bed and marched past Shawn and down the stairs. He was in no mood for their domestic squabbles and so decided that he might pay his mother a visit, find out what she was up to.
Shawn waited till the door closed behind Rex before he walked over to the bed, he sat down and reached for Mimi’s hand but she moved to the very edge of the bed, as far away from him as she could get.
He frowned at her action, “Mimi for God’s sake what’s gotten into you? You were supposed to come around this afternoon and you didn’t show.”
He watched her eyes cloud over, she pulled the covers up to her chest as though protecting herself from him; “I have nothing to say to you, we have nothing to say to each other. Not anymore.”
“You have nothing to say? Well I sure have a lot to say about a lot of things. You didn’t even try to make it work, you just left, turned your back on everything we’d built together.”
Finally, finally they were talking; too bad it was too late. If it had happened before she’d walked in on him with Belle, they could very well have been moving her things back in right now, she was glad they weren’t though, she didn’t want to be made a fool of twice by Shawn Brady, she didn’t want to be lied to anymore, “Everything we’d built together? Are you kidding me, we had nothing together or at least it wasn’t worth much, since it was so easy for you to turn your back on.”
“I wasn’t the one who walked out Mimi; that was you.”
“You made your choice. You made your choice a long time ago, long before I walked out that door. You chose Belle, you chose her over me and your son. That was your choice, so live with it.”
“You’re blaming me for wanting to spend time with my daughter? You’re holding that against me?”
“No Shawn, I didn’t include Claire in that statement; did I? I said you chose Belle, like you always do; Claire has nothing to do with this. I’d never begrudge you seeing your daughter; you should know that by now.”
“I’m sorry; I guess I’m just confused. You don’t begrudge me seeing my daughter, that’s why you kept the fact that she was my daughter from me for months?”
“Yes I did. I kept it from you, I apologised and I thought we’d gotten over it. Obviously I was mistaken and it’s not something you can get over.”
“I’m angry with you Mimi; I have a right to be.”
“That’s fine. That’s okay. Be angry; be as angry as you want. There’s nothing I can do to stop you, but I don’t have to put up with it, I don’t have to have my mistakes shoved down my throat every day. I messed up, I screwed up people’s lives and I’m sorry. I’ve told you that countless times, I’ve told everyone that, so if you expect me to keep apologising for it, you can think again because it’s not going to happen. I’m not going to spend the rest of my life apologising for it. I wasn’t the only one who made mistakes Shawn, but it seems I’m the only one taking responsibility for them.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“You think about it Shawn, think real hard about it.” She turned from him, eager to get to the bathroom before the tears started again, she didn’t want him to see her crying, not anymore.
Did she know? Had he been mistaken in thinking Victoria hadn’t told her? Had she known all along? “We’re not done with this conversation.” He shouted to her retreating back.
“Well I am so you can see yourself out.” She shoved the bathroom door shut in his face, hoping he’d be gone by the time she came out.
Shawn decided it was time he left, maybe he just needed to let Mimi cool down; he needed to cool down himself. He’s said things, things he hadn’t even been aware that he felt, things he’d been so sure he’d gotten over, it was surprising to realise that he hadn’t. he came up short when he saw Victoria standing in the doorway.
“What the hell was that all about?” Victoria asked, she’d come by to see Rex, knowing Shawn and Mimi would be at the loft apartment ‘working’ on their relationship instead she walked in on a full out war between the two of them.
“Ask your precious friend, she seems more clued in, I’m d**ned if I know half of what she’s talking about.”
“Oh you have some nerve Shawn Douglas Brady!” Mimi spat as she stormed down the stairs, “You know very well what I’m talking about.”
“I don’t know what’s going on between the two of you,” Victoria said, putting her hands up in surrender and backing towards the door, “but I’ll just remove myself.”
“No Victoria, you don’t have to go.” Mimi said, halting her, “I’m sure Shawn won’t mind if you’re clued in, he certainly tells you a hell of a lot more than he tells me.”
Tory doubled back, had Mimi just attacked her? How had she become involved in an argument about their marriage? It seemed maybe Shawn had been right all along, about her staying out of people’s private affairs, once again, as was the case with Chelsea, she was caught in the middle. “I’m not getting involved in this, this is between the two of you and-”
“Oh but you’re already involved sister dear, so why don’t you pull up a chair?” Shawn said.
It took her a while to realise what was going on, she put it down to the emotional wrangling she’d been through herself recently. “Okay,” she stated, “where do you want to start? Mimi, would you like to go first?”
“No, I think maybe its time Shawn went first. What do you say Shawn?”
“I have nothing to say.”
Mimi through up her arms, “That’s the problem right there, you never have anything to say when it really matters. I don’t even know why I bother trying, it’s really hard-”
“Well of course it is,” Victoria said interrupting her, “you didn’t think it would be easy did you? If love came easy, we’d never appreciate it for what it was and you do not let it go simply because you’ve found yourself facing a barrier you can’t cross, no you find a way over, under or around it and if you’re really lucky, you’ll find the means within yourself to go through it, together. So instead of standing there complaining about how hard it is consider what its like for the other person. Sit down and talk; have a real conversation and don’t rehash past mistakes, look for a way to get over them.”
“Tell me Victoria,” Mimi sneered at her, “since you’re so smart, since you seem to be the expert when it comes to everything really. How am I supposed to get over the fact that I walked in on Shawn and Belle having sex when he was supposed to be waiting for me so we could ‘talk’? How do I get over that?”
Victoria stared at Shawn in shock, Shawn in turn was staring at Mimi with and equal amount of shock, “I- I …”
“You what Shawn? Come on, spit it out.” Mimi shouted. “You see what I mean?” Mimi asked Tory, “He never has anything to say when it really counts.”
Victoria shook her head, “I’m sorry, but this really has nothing to do with me, I can’t help you.” She gave Shawn an accusing look, he knew that looked, it meant she’d just filed him in the same category as her husband and every other worthless male she’d ever met; “I don’t think anyone can.”
Mimi came around the corner and almost knocked both herself and Shawn to the floor. Had it not been for Shawn grabbing her by the arms, that’s exactly where she would have ended up. “You have got to stop running around like that.” he said, not letting her go.
“I wasn’t running, I was looking in my bag for my car keys.” she defended herself, all too aware of the heat of his hands on her arms.
He smiled, catching the slight show of annoyance on her face, “Maybe we should start over,” he suggested, “Hi Mimi, what you are doing here?”
As if it were that easy, Mimi thought, but chose not to spoil the moment, “Hi Shawn, I’m here visiting a friend and- what happened to your hand?”
For the first time she noticed the bandage on his right hand. He shrugged, “Kitchen accident.”
“Is it badly hurt?” she asked, her concern for his well-being outweighing her annoyance with him.
“A couple of stitches that’s all.”
“So what really happened?” she asked as she let go of the hand she had grabbed so suddenly when she’d spotted the bandage.
“You don’t believe me? It was a kitchen accident, Tory dropped a bowl and broke it, I picked up the pieces and cut myself in the process.” he explained.
Mimi frowned, “And she didn’t opt to drive you to the hospital? That doesn’t sound like her.”
“Yeah well what does these days.” Shawn muttered under his breathe.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.” Mimi was all too aware that she had never been meant to here his comment.
“She’s not exactly in the best state to be driving right now, that breakdown you were all expecting to happen, it finally did. She’s probably still crying her eyes out and besides, she doesn’t know about the cut or that I left the apartment for that matter.”
“Well then,” Mimi said as she pressed the elevator’s button indicating that they wanted to go down, “you’d better be getting home, there’s no telling what her mental state is, she might freak if she finds you’ve left.”
That hadn’t occurred to Shawn and he turned a worried gaze to Mimi, “Do you think that’ll happen?”
“Victoria’s strong, I doubt she’d fall apart because you’re not there, but than again, she’s hurting too. People act in strange ways when they’re hurting.”
They walked together out of the hospital and were surprised to find they were parked a few cars away from each other. “Well,” Mimi said as Shawn walked her to her car, “I guess I’ll see you around.”
Shawn smiled down at her, things were slightly more awkward between them since the day Zach had gotten sick, but it was a good awkward. The kind that arose when you’re first dating someone and you’re unsure as to whether you should kiss them goodbye or simply walk away. Shawn decided to do the latter and leaned down to touch his lips to Mimi’s, the spark ignited, it was a while before Mimi placed her hand on his chest to push him away. “Before we take this any further, we have to talk Shawn. Have a serious talk.”
He nodded, he knew things between them weren’t sorted and Mimi was not the sort of woman to ignore their problems simply because she couldn’t get enough of his kisses, it was one of the reasons he loved her so much. “I’m busy over the next few days, how about Saturday?”
That gave him three days to think about what he was going to say to have her give them a second chance. If he had known that just agreeing to talk had earned him a dollop of brownie points, he might not have worried so much.
“I guess I’ll see you around then.” Mimi said as she kissed him one last time on the cheek before getting into her car and driving off. Shawn stood there watching her leave and was reminded of another time she’d done so, the day she walked out on him, but then, she hadn’t held up her hand and waved to him as she drove off, smiling he turned to his own car.
*****
“Tory?” he called as he let himself into the apartment. He’d lucked out on the way home and had come across a store that was still open. Tory came out of her room, tissue in hand and swollen eyes, “Hey, I was wondering where you’d gotten to.”
He took the bowl out of its wrapping and handed it to her, “Melamine.” He explained, “Won’t brake as easily.”
She took it with a smile, “Kinda like me. How’s your hand?”
“How did you-”
“You didn’t clean all the glass, I figured with the blood…”
He shrugged, “It’s okay, just a few stitches.”
She grimaced, “I’m sorry, it should never have happened. If I didn’t act like a total lunatic, you wouldn’t have needed to clean it up and you wouldn’t have gotten cut.”
He chose not to inform her as to exactly how he’d come by the cut, she didn’t need to know that he only regretted that it hadn’t been due to the pulverising of her husband’s face that he needed the stitches. “No biggy. Are you hungry because with all the excitement tonight, I’m starving; I thought we’d pop down to the pub and-” he stopped because she was shaking her head, “What?”
“No need to, the Pub stopped by while you were out and brought dinner to us. Grandma Caroline was gracious enough to throw in dessert.” And another shoulder to cry on. She put the bowl down on the kitchen counter and went to the oven. “You actually just missed her; she wanted to stop by Chelsea’s before heading home.”
They sat down to an enjoyable dinner, enjoyable but quiet as each was left to their own thoughts. It was Tory who eventually broke the silence. Shawn peered up from his plate as she addressed him, “Yes?”
“I’ve been thinking about things. About my life and Lucien in particular and… What I’m trying to say is, ask really… I need your help with something but only if you’re willing of course –”
“Victoria just spit it out.”
“I want you to help me find out what he’s up to.”
She didn’t have to say who ‘he’ was, Shawn got that pretty loud and clear but he didn’t think she knew what she was saying, that she knew what happened to people who went against the Dimeras, “Tory-”
She shook her head, “It’s no use trying to talk me out of it, I’m not going to drop this; I don’t care how dangerous you think it might be. I need to know Shawn, can you understand that? I need to know where I fit into the plan; I need to know what role I was supposed to play, I need to know what damage I may have caused my family by living in that house with him, by bringing my sister into that house, my fa-”
“No!” Shawn shouted with such ferocity that she almost jumped out of her chair, “You do not blame yourself for any of this, anything that has or has yet to occur. You are not responsible; I will not have you feeling guilty over something he chose to do. You’re as much a victim in all this as his intended victims.”
“But-”
“No ‘buts’ Victoria.” Shawn stated adamantly.
“I want to stop him. I want to prevent him from hurting anyone else, I especially want him prevent him from hurting my family. I will do it Shawn, with or without your help; I’m hoping it’s with.”
“You don’t understand-”
She pushed up out of her chair and walked over to him, “No! Don’t tell me I don’t understand, you’re the one who doesn’t understand Shawn, you don’t understand that I have to do this.”
“No you don’t!” he pushed his plate away and got up himself, leaning over her, “You have no clue what the Dimeras are capable of, I do not want you hurt any more than you already are.”
“That’s not possible!” she shouted at him, not backing off for a minute. Why couldn’t he understand that this was something she needed to do, for her own piece of mind, she needed to know what Luc was up to so she’d know exactly where she’d fit in and how gullible she’d been. She needed to know if there was even a small chance that Luc loved her, that he wasn’t only using her. She needed to do this to feel safe, to feel that her judgement wasn’t as screwed up as she believed; she wanted to find out that Luc wasn’t doing anything evil or underhanded. And stupid as it was with everything she knew, she held onto the slim chance that she’d blown everything out of proportion; that somehow they could still be together because ultimately that’s what she wanted in the end.
“It’s always possible, as long as you draw breathe, its possible to hurt more. I don’t want you to find that out and I don’t want you dead, because that’s where a lot of people who mess in Dimera affairs end up Tory, and they don’t always find the body.” Why couldn’t she understand that she was endangering her life? Why couldn’t she see that in doing this, she would dispel all hope that Lucien Dimera was a good guy and then the hate and the bitterness would set in? If she found out his plans, it’d only make things worse for her. If she found out that she’d been used more than she’d thought at first, she’d make it her mission to destroy him and that would ultimately destroy her.
“Shawn please!” she begged, he could see the desperation in her eyes, hear it in her voice and he knew he shouldn’t give in but he also knew she’d do this without him if need be, just as she’d promised.
“Okay but we do things my way.”
She was about to protest then realised that he’d just conceded a very important point, she could do the same, “Okay, but I have one condition. You cannot tell anyone, most especially our parents.”
“Vict-” he cut himself short, realising that there might be some advantage to doing all this without their parents involved. The less people there were who knew, the safer it would be for the two of them. “Agreed but if things start getting heavy, we bring them in on this. I don’t think they’d appreciate being handed two dead children on a platter courtesy of the Dimeras.”
Victoria tried to shrug the comment off but deep down feared that Shawn was right. And if something were to happen to them, it’d be her fault that Claire and Zach grew up without a father, “Maybe I should ask Rex instead, he has less to lose and-”
“You asked me. Now, how exactly were you planning on bringing down Dimera?”
She went to her room to collect the file she’d been working on for some time, “If my years spent with my nose in books has taught me anything, it’s how to do research. I’ve also picked up a neat habit of filing away inconsequential things that may be of importance later on, things like telephone conversations or files lying open in the study, you know. This,” she handed him the file, “is what I’ve managed to come up with so far, it’s not much but it’s a start.”
Shawn opened the file and started reading; it listed every conversation she remembered between Lucien and Patrick, files she may have accidentally come across while in the study, business appointments he’d had. All they had to do now was connect the dots and hope they got the full picture. “You’ve been busy.”
She shrugged, “Like I said, I’ve been working on it for a long time.”
Shawn hoped some of the investigative genes had been passed down to the both of them. They would need all the help they could get, most especially if they were going up against a Dimera.
Chapter 61
Mimi knocked on the door; she still had her key but felt uncomfortable using it. She hadn’t used it since she’d walked out almost a year ago and didn’t feel comfortable using it now. Besides, Shawn had said he’d be home; that he was now sharing the loft apartment with Victoria did much to alleviate her fears about Belle. With Tory around, Belle would not be making a nuisance of herself; the two disliked each other intensely and could barely stomach being in the same room together. She knocked again and when there was still no answer, used her key and let herself in, maybe Shawn had gone out. It didn’t seem likely since he was after all expecting her but maybe he’d run out of milk or something.
She had placed her purse on the kitchen counter as she entered when she heard a noise, going to investigate. She managed to keep herself together till she walked into the apartment. Till she saw Rex and he asked her, “Hey, are you okay?”
Then the reality of what she’d just seen hit her. Belle and Shawn together, in bed. She shook her head, “No,” she said with a trembling voice, “I’m not okay, I’ll never be okay. Nothing is ever going to be okay again because I just walked in on my husband having sex with Belle, I don’t even know why I’m surprised. He’s sleeping with his perfect princess, someone who’s certainly more perfect than I am. God Rex, why aren’t I enough? Why am I never enough?” She held on to him, leaned on his strength, allowed him to support her. Then the sobs broke out and her knees gave in, had it not been for him, she’d have collapsed in a heap on the floor.
He held on, tightly. It had been so long since he’d held her in his arms; he’d forgotten what it felt like. Rex stood there, holding Mimi as she cried herself out. When the tears subsided, he picked her up and carried her up to the bed. Oblivious to where she was, only conscious of the pain, Mimi didn’t object when he laid her down and drew the covers over her shuddering body. She did protest at the removal of his body heat, of the comfort of another human being. “Don’t go, please don’t go.” She reached for his hand, refusing to release it. “Stay.” Moving deftly over her, as she wouldn’t release his hand, Rex settled next to her on the bed. Drawing her close, wrapping her in his arms, he offered her the comfort she sought, the comfort she craved. They didn’t talk, just laid there till they both fell asleep. She from exhaustion and he out of necessity, she still wouldn’t let go of his hand, even in sleep.
*****
“What the hell…Are you out of your mind?” Shawn pushed himself off the bed, “What possessed you?”“Me? You were the one who grabbed me, I’d just come to wake you up. The way you asked me to. I wasn’t expecting you to jump all over me.” Belle responded, matching Shawn’s anger.
“I thought you were Mimi.”
“Yeah, so I heard.” In the instant he’d murmured Mimi’s name, all her hopes had been shattered; she knew then that there could be no future for the two of them because Shawn was still very much in love with his wife.
“Why would you even do something like this? If Mimi had walked in… Did you plan this, so that she would walk in?”
“No! You have a very high opinion of yourself.”
“You’ve made it perfectly clear over the last few months that you wanted us to be together. That you would do almost anything to see that happening.”
“Yeah, and Mimi made it perfectly clear that she didn’t want you back, that she wouldn’t even bother fighting for you. All I have to do is sit back and wait till you’re free, I don’t have to resort to schemes to get the two of you apart; you already are.”
“No, this is just temporary, until we sort out a few things. Then we’ll be right on track again. We’ll be together again.”
“I love that you’re so optimistic, that you can still believe that after all that has happened this past year, Mimi’s simply going to come back to you. I love that you still believe Mimi’s going to give you the time of day when she’s living with her ex boyfriend, no wait, her ex-fiancé.”
“They’re just friends and I’m her husband, she actually married me.”
“Only because Rex left. Just think Shawn, if Rex had stuck around, you would never have been with Mimi. No, those two would probably be playing house right now. Oh wait,” she said, covering her mouth in mock shock, “they already are. I wonder how long it’ll be before Zach is calling Rex ‘daddy’.”
That struck a nerve, especially since his daughter already called someone else ‘daddy’, “You’re wrong, Mimi is over Rex. He’s her past.”
“The same way you are. Now if you’d excuse me, I have a daughter who’ll be home any minute.”
“Belle’s only trying to mess with my head, Mimi is not with Rex.” There’s only one way to find out for sure. Grabbing his things, he left the loft. Belle watched as he stormed out.
That’s right Shawn, she thought, go see for yourself.
*****
Mimi snuggled closer but there was a barrier between her and the person holding her. Shawn. She slowly opened her eyes, the scent wasn’t Shawn’s, but it was still familiar. Rex. It was Rex holding her; she was lying in bed with Rex. How had they ended up here and did they…No, they were both fully clothed and what’s more, she was lying under the covers, that’s what the barrier was.“What the hell is going on here?” she sat up at the same time Rex did and saw Shawn standing at the top of the stairs, murder in his eyes.
“What does it look like?” she asked him innocently, knowing full well what he thought.
“It looks like…”
But Rex, not willing to be dragged into their game interrupted Shawn, “Open your eyes man. We’re both fully dressed and what’s more, she was under the covers and I was on them when you came barging in here. Which by the way, you had no right to do considering you don’t live here.”
“I have every right considering that my son stays here and my sister gave me a key.”
“Whatever.” Rex said as he climbed off the bed and marched past Shawn and down the stairs. He was in no mood for their domestic squabbles and so decided that he might pay his mother a visit, find out what she was up to.
Shawn waited till the door closed behind Rex before he walked over to the bed, he sat down and reached for Mimi’s hand but she moved to the very edge of the bed, as far away from him as she could get.
He frowned at her action, “Mimi for God’s sake what’s gotten into you? You were supposed to come around this afternoon and you didn’t show.”
He watched her eyes cloud over, she pulled the covers up to her chest as though protecting herself from him; “I have nothing to say to you, we have nothing to say to each other. Not anymore.”
“You have nothing to say? Well I sure have a lot to say about a lot of things. You didn’t even try to make it work, you just left, turned your back on everything we’d built together.”
Finally, finally they were talking; too bad it was too late. If it had happened before she’d walked in on him with Belle, they could very well have been moving her things back in right now, she was glad they weren’t though, she didn’t want to be made a fool of twice by Shawn Brady, she didn’t want to be lied to anymore, “Everything we’d built together? Are you kidding me, we had nothing together or at least it wasn’t worth much, since it was so easy for you to turn your back on.”
“I wasn’t the one who walked out Mimi; that was you.”
“You made your choice. You made your choice a long time ago, long before I walked out that door. You chose Belle, you chose her over me and your son. That was your choice, so live with it.”
“You’re blaming me for wanting to spend time with my daughter? You’re holding that against me?”
“No Shawn, I didn’t include Claire in that statement; did I? I said you chose Belle, like you always do; Claire has nothing to do with this. I’d never begrudge you seeing your daughter; you should know that by now.”
“I’m sorry; I guess I’m just confused. You don’t begrudge me seeing my daughter, that’s why you kept the fact that she was my daughter from me for months?”
“Yes I did. I kept it from you, I apologised and I thought we’d gotten over it. Obviously I was mistaken and it’s not something you can get over.”
“I’m angry with you Mimi; I have a right to be.”
“That’s fine. That’s okay. Be angry; be as angry as you want. There’s nothing I can do to stop you, but I don’t have to put up with it, I don’t have to have my mistakes shoved down my throat every day. I messed up, I screwed up people’s lives and I’m sorry. I’ve told you that countless times, I’ve told everyone that, so if you expect me to keep apologising for it, you can think again because it’s not going to happen. I’m not going to spend the rest of my life apologising for it. I wasn’t the only one who made mistakes Shawn, but it seems I’m the only one taking responsibility for them.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“You think about it Shawn, think real hard about it.” She turned from him, eager to get to the bathroom before the tears started again, she didn’t want him to see her crying, not anymore.
Did she know? Had he been mistaken in thinking Victoria hadn’t told her? Had she known all along? “We’re not done with this conversation.” He shouted to her retreating back.
“Well I am so you can see yourself out.” She shoved the bathroom door shut in his face, hoping he’d be gone by the time she came out.
Shawn decided it was time he left, maybe he just needed to let Mimi cool down; he needed to cool down himself. He’s said things, things he hadn’t even been aware that he felt, things he’d been so sure he’d gotten over, it was surprising to realise that he hadn’t. he came up short when he saw Victoria standing in the doorway.
“What the hell was that all about?” Victoria asked, she’d come by to see Rex, knowing Shawn and Mimi would be at the loft apartment ‘working’ on their relationship instead she walked in on a full out war between the two of them.
“Ask your precious friend, she seems more clued in, I’m d**ned if I know half of what she’s talking about.”
“Oh you have some nerve Shawn Douglas Brady!” Mimi spat as she stormed down the stairs, “You know very well what I’m talking about.”
“I don’t know what’s going on between the two of you,” Victoria said, putting her hands up in surrender and backing towards the door, “but I’ll just remove myself.”
“No Victoria, you don’t have to go.” Mimi said, halting her, “I’m sure Shawn won’t mind if you’re clued in, he certainly tells you a hell of a lot more than he tells me.”
Tory doubled back, had Mimi just attacked her? How had she become involved in an argument about their marriage? It seemed maybe Shawn had been right all along, about her staying out of people’s private affairs, once again, as was the case with Chelsea, she was caught in the middle. “I’m not getting involved in this, this is between the two of you and-”
“Oh but you’re already involved sister dear, so why don’t you pull up a chair?” Shawn said.
It took her a while to realise what was going on, she put it down to the emotional wrangling she’d been through herself recently. “Okay,” she stated, “where do you want to start? Mimi, would you like to go first?”
“No, I think maybe its time Shawn went first. What do you say Shawn?”
“I have nothing to say.”
Mimi through up her arms, “That’s the problem right there, you never have anything to say when it really matters. I don’t even know why I bother trying, it’s really hard-”
“Well of course it is,” Victoria said interrupting her, “you didn’t think it would be easy did you? If love came easy, we’d never appreciate it for what it was and you do not let it go simply because you’ve found yourself facing a barrier you can’t cross, no you find a way over, under or around it and if you’re really lucky, you’ll find the means within yourself to go through it, together. So instead of standing there complaining about how hard it is consider what its like for the other person. Sit down and talk; have a real conversation and don’t rehash past mistakes, look for a way to get over them.”
“Tell me Victoria,” Mimi sneered at her, “since you’re so smart, since you seem to be the expert when it comes to everything really. How am I supposed to get over the fact that I walked in on Shawn and Belle having sex when he was supposed to be waiting for me so we could ‘talk’? How do I get over that?”
Victoria stared at Shawn in shock, Shawn in turn was staring at Mimi with and equal amount of shock, “I- I …”
“You what Shawn? Come on, spit it out.” Mimi shouted. “You see what I mean?” Mimi asked Tory, “He never has anything to say when it really counts.”
Victoria shook her head, “I’m sorry, but this really has nothing to do with me, I can’t help you.” She gave Shawn an accusing look, he knew that looked, it meant she’d just filed him in the same category as her husband and every other worthless male she’d ever met; “I don’t think anyone can.”
